For My Stalker
To the Stalker who keeps popping up on my website:
I see you. I know you’re there.
And no, I’m not talking about the people who come to learn.
The people who genuinely want to heal.
I’m talking about one specific individual who cannot leave me alone. Will not leave me alone.
What are you looking for?
Why are you keeping tabs on me?
Because I left your ass?
Because I said “no?” Full stop – a one-word sentence.
Maybe this is one of the reasons why.
You don’t ever give anybody space.
You’re always on top of them.
It screams needy.
It screams desperate.
Energy vampire much?
You?
You’re paranoid.
Maybe you should find a new coping mechanism.
Oh wait, your therapist already told you that…over a year ago.
But you didn’t listen.
You didn’t want to change.
This is all a game to you, right?
It’s weird and it’s creepy.
What are you trying to find on me?
What are you trying to use against me?
Is it the audience?
The perfect persona you’re trying to save?
You see, I know you want me scared.
I know you want me worried.
Have you told people about how you threaten me behind closed doors?
How you harass me and bully me?
In front of our child?
Do you tell people how much of an abuser you are?
Sometimes it’s outright abuse and sometimes it’s reactive abuse.
But it is abuse, no matter how you slice and dice it.
Emotional abuse. Verbal abuse. The same pattern with your parents.
Apples don’t fall far from their trees.
Keep it up, and I will. I will scream it from the rooftops. I will tell everyone about you.
Because I’m done.
I’m done with you.
It’s really quite simple.
But your ego never thought it would be you, right?
You remember 2008?
When someone else said they’d steal me away from you?
You laughed.
No, instead, you just keep stealing from me.
You steal my time, my money, my energy, and you’ve stolen my life.
Well, you did.
Until I took my power back.
Now, you’re obsessed. Obsessed with checking my website.
Obsessed with surveilling me. Obsessed with watching me. Obsessed with scaring me.
Even after I’ve repeatedly asked you to stop.
Here you go, motherfucker.
It’s all in black and white. Because I’m not the “crazy” one.
Except what you don’t realize, is that all the best people are a little crazy.
It’s what makes them, them. Oh, I love that movie.
You see, I’ve been in training my whole life. I’ve been prepared. Prepared for this moment.
The moment where I keep my dignity intact and move forward.
Because I know you’re watching.
So I’ll give you what you want. I’ll give you the show.
Because Queens don’t mingle with peasants. And a peasant is what you are.
The only way you can try to trick me is by trying to trigger me.
You know what that says?
It says a heck of a lot more about you, and your low vibrational energy.
You think energy is not real. But you believe in science? Haha.
So for you, Einstein’s energy formula is also not real?
It doesn’t even make sense. Because you don’t make sense.
So to my stalker who keeps tabs on my website:
I know you resent me for growing.
But if we’re not growing, we’re dying, and I refuse to die with you.
I’ll help you dig your grave though, ‘cuz surely you were trying to dig mine.
Go ahead and keep watching.
Watch my rise.
You can’t touch me anymore. You can’t hurt me anymore.
#Iwin.
